He say’s “She wastes money on stuff we don’t need – at this rate we will never save anything”
She say’s “He is stingy, and I feel guilty every time I spend money on myself – it’s not as if we can’t afford it”
He feels the responsibility of paying the house off, plus the kids future education, plus retirement is all on his shoulders.
She feels that because she is also working, she wants more control financially but doesn’t feel comfortable and confident exerting it.
Both of them hate bringing up the subject of money as it always ends in a fight.
Couples may see eye to eye on most things yet view money matters very differently. Financial roles have changed, and the pressure of living the ‘good life’ often means that couples experience more financial pressure than ever before. Yet even though there are more working couples today, less money is being saved.
Often, arguments about money are not about a shortage of cash. Some money disputes are really a manifestation of some other problem. For example, an over spender may be trying to tell a partner they want more attention. Some money problems are about control – with one partner wanting to make all of the decisions without compromise.
Other common areas of conflict between couples include;
– spending versus savings styles
– raising children and money issues
– who controls the purse strings
– joint accounts versus separate accounts.
Allowing money disputes to fester unresolved often leads to relatively minor issues getting blown out of all proportion – result; unhappiness.
It doesn’t have to be that way. The key to resolving money issues in relationships is to be honest about how you feel, to discuss the issues openly, and to understand your differences and plan around them – respecting each others differences instead of judging them- result; happiness.